Could this be trauma?

Trauma is a term we often hear, but understanding what it truly means and how it affects us can be complex.

Dr. Gabor Maté, a renowned physician and author, explains that trauma isn't just about the distressing event itself but what happens inside us as a result. He describes it as "a psychic wound that leaves a scar. It leaves an imprint in your nervous system, in your body, in your psyche, and then shows up in multiple ways that are not helpful to you later on."

"Trauma is not what happens to you; it is what happens inside you as a result of what happens to you"

Trauma is not solely about the event but the lasting impact it has on our mind and body. Therefore, we don't define trauma by the events people have experienced in their lives. Not everyone has the same nervous system reaction to the same event, meaning many people can experience the same event, but not all will develop symptoms of trauma.

It's important to understand that many different situations and events can leave a trauma reaction in the body. Some are big and obvious and what we might easily identify as traumatic, while others are more subtle and often harder to see, and therefore often overlooked.

It's sometimes helpful to understand traumatic events in terms of "Big T trauma" and "Little t trauma":

Examples of Big T Trauma:

Serious car accidents

Physical or sexual abuse

Natural disasters (like a flood or wildfire)

Combat or war experiences

Witnessing a violent act or death

Life-threatening medical emergencies

These events can overwhelm our system all at once, leaving lasting emotional and physical effects. These are often single or time-limited events. Often they include fear of the possibility of death. The diagnostic classification of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is centered around Big T Trauma.

Examples of little t trauma:

Repeatedly being criticized or shamed in childhood

A parent or caregiver being emotionally unavailable or inconsistent

Repeated bullying at school or work

Discrimination and ostracization

Lack of stability in childhood

Feeling chronically unseen and unheard

Growing up in a home of divorce, parental mental illness, poverty, or addiction

Little t trauma is often from long-term, ongoing adverse conditions in childhood. In childhood, lack of safety, security, and secure attachment is felt by the body as ongoing risk. Often, little t trauma is understood within the term, Complex PTSD, although this is not listed in the DSM (diagnostic guide) and is often instead diagnosed as Trauma and Stressor Related Disorder.

Whether it's "big" or "little" t trauma, the impact on us as humans can look very similar.

Trauma expert Janina Fisher helps us understand that traumatic events leave behind a "Living Legacy" of symptoms:

Depression, loss of interest, feelings of hopelessness

Few or no memories

Irritability, insomnia

Emotional numbing or overwhelm

Substance abuse, eating disorders

Chronic pain, headaches, chronic digestive issues

Anxiety, panic attacks, mistrust, hypervigilance

Nightmares, flashbacks

Self-destructive behaviour

Feeling unreal or out of body

If you identify with some of the symptoms and wonder if you might be experiencing the ongoing effects of trauma, reach out to a therapist with training in identifying and treating trauma. Sometimes, because of the variation in trauma experiences and symptoms, it can go unrecognized or misdiagnosed (especially little t trauma).

It is possible to heal from trauma. Healing begins with understanding—and with the right support, it can lead to greater connection, self-compassion, and ease in your everyday life. Reach out today if you'd like to further explore this with me.

This short YouTube video shows Dr. Gabor Mate providing more information on trauma:

PS- I'll soon add a blog post about vicarious (or secondary) trauma and intergenerational trauma.